The Art of Becoming

ROMANCING RESISTANCE PART 3

And just like that my 100 day challenge is a wrap — or is it — after all it is 2023. On that note, Happy New Year! I hope your holiday season has been beautiful.

Now, getting back to that hundred day challenge. The premise of the challenge was to “rendezvous with resistance”. Especially as it appeared regularly when attempting to accomplish the task that I set out to.  Which admittedly, I have all too often allowed resistance to be an excuse to stop me from following through — more times than I am willing to admit.

Let’s first define the word challenge, according to the Cambridge English Dictionary, something that needs great mental or physical effort in order to be done successfully and therefore tests a person’s ability. Trust me, I knew my hundred days of movement was going to be a challenge. Moreover, anyone choosing to embark on their own challenge should also be prepared for it to be challenging.

During the challenge I expected to create a new habit, and possibly learn a few things about myself, which I ended up doing both. What I didn’t expect was the major euphonies, ah-ha moments, and identity shifts that occurred also throughout those 100 days.

Likewise learning that real change occurs when we continually push through the plethora of resistant excuses that our brains tend to offer up to us. The key to any real successful change starts with awareness. If we aren’t aware of our habits, behaviors, thoughts, emotions, or unproductive patterns, we tend to continue, cycle, and repeat them regularly. Ultimately creating the same day and the same life, unconsciously.

It is only through awareness that realize we have an option in how we react, act, and even choose who to be, consciously. Awareness allows us to choose emotions we want to feel, thoughts we want to think, and behave as whe we want to show up as in our own lives. Awareness shines light on old unproductive patterns, guide in more fulfilling habits and ways of being, which then aid in aligning our behavior with our authentic selves.

The challenge actually was — me becoming me. Becoming who exactly? Well, that is for me to decide. 😏

I also learned that resistance is all in our minds. It isn’t a brick wall, a force field, or some external force keeping us from doing the thing we committed to. Resistance is the excuses we tell ourselves, the justifications we come up with, and the old comfortable patterned habits (of our identity) we choose to indulge in.

One of my earliest ah-ha moments was recognizing that I could come up against resistance, acknowledge any feelings associated with it, allow it, and then fulfill the commitment I made to myself despite it.  It was through this process that I also learned that motivation comes on the heels of action.

Let me stress that again — motivation comes on the heels of taking action.  When we wait for motivation to move us towards success, we find ourselves waiting a very long time with often limited and sporadic action that not only yields little to zero rewards, but also slows any long term progress as we repeatedly stop and start on ourselves.

Next, I never once regretted the movement I had committed to. I religiously followed through for ninety days, with not one regret.  I learned that when I did what I committed to, my day didn’t end up going to pot — like it inevitably always did, every other time in my past when I didn’t follow through. I also didn’t struggle with self-loathing mind chatter, or the incessant weight of “I still need to do this”, or “this has to get done”. When I committed to it, it got done. It was that simple.

And just like that, life happened, at day 90 I tested positive with Covid and got sidelined for 10 days.  I took a deep breathes, and got lots of rest, but what I didn’t do, was ruminate, or beat myself up, allow myself to spiral out of control, or even delay any longer than necessary.  I picked up where I had left off and completed my challenge 10 days later.

I kind of thought I’d celebrate or reward myself upon completion of my challenge, nope. I posted that I’d completed the challenge, and that was it. You see, something strange happened somewhere around the 66 day mark. I stop focusing on the resistance, and even the end of the challenge — instead I started to plan the next challenge, the next goal or habit, or the next facet of my personality that I wanted to change. This was an extremely fascinating discovery.

So you’ve heard it here — there will be another 100 day challenge, I’ve actually already began. Who knows, moving forward I may set most of my goals, habits, and challenges to fit within one hundred day increments.

I know this much — I look forward to 2023, armed with knowledge, with wisdom, and with abundant evidence that what’s possible is actually limitless, and can start with just 100 days. If, like me, you are starting your new year off by reflecting on what you would like to create, change or cultivate more of in your 2023, and could use a bit of guidance and support, I would love to work with you.

I am now offering a coaching package: The Art of Becoming. Where I assist you in permanently transforming your life, one small habit at a time, and all within 100 days.